My Soul's Desire
by Jedi Caro
Summary: After Emma's sacrifice, Regina starts looking for ways to bring the Savior back. With Maleficent's help, she finds a spell that sends her to a 'Desired Moment' in time. The catch? The spell will 'loop' until her 'Soul's Desire' is achieved. How far will you go for the people you love? Swan Queen is Endgame (Mentions of Hook/Emma & Robin/Regina)
1. Prologue

Title: My Soul's Desire

 **BOLD** : Thoughts

 _ITALICS_ : Memories

* * *

 **Prologue**

 _Regina felt the darkness envelop her body. She felt impotent, as the darkness prevented her body from making any movements. Her heart felt heavy, she felt the light slowly get sucked out of her heart and soul. Her mind told her to look for her soul mate in the small group of people, but her heart betrayed her. Instead of looking for Robin, her eyes looked directly into those deep-green eyes that belonged to Emma Swan. Even in this state, her heart longed for the person she truly loves, for the one person that time and time again has chosen her, the only one that has accepted her with all her flaws._

 ** _And this is how it would all end_** _, Regina thought._

 _She saw Emma stride towards her, and all she could think about was,_ _ **Don't be an idiot!**_

 _"No! There has to be another way!", Regina exclaimed with desperation._

 _"There isn't! You worked to hard to have your happiness destroyed!", Emma said starting to reach for the darkness but was stopped by Hook._

 ** _Finally, doing something right, stupid Pirate._**

 _The darkness was starting to cloud her senses. She couldn't hear what was transpiring between the Pirate and the mother of their son._ _ **THEIR son**_ _. Would she be able to see her son again? Would she be able to see Emma again? She opened her eyes to see the woman she loved stepping closer to Hook._

 _"I love you"_

 _She heard Emma say, and what was left of her heart started to break._ _ **Stupid idiot, she doesn't love you**_ _._ _ **She will never love you**_ _._

 _Emma started walking towards her again, her eyes never leaving Regina's. She saw how she raised the dagger and felt how the darkness started to leave her body and surround Emma's._

* * *

 **If only I had a second chance, just to show you how much I love you** _._

Emma's eyes still hunt her. Why didn't she move? Why didn't she try and save her? Emma sacrificed herself for Regina, and she let Robin hold her back while the one she loves was lifted into the night sky.

"Such an imbecile", Regina whispered while drinking from her cup of whiskey.

She sat at her desk, looking around the room. She has lost count on how many books she had already read trying to find a way to bring Emma back. It's been almost two weeks since the darkness had taken Emma away and she hasn't made any progress. She closed her eyes and searched her mental list of spells for a possible candidate, a spell that could help them with the search for Merlin. None came to mind.

"If you keep drinking those, you'll never going to find your answer", she heard Maleficent say from the other side of the room. She opened her eyes to see her leaning against the room entrance.

"Also, you need to get out of this house more. People are going to believe you were sucked in by the darkness as well", Maleficent said with a smirk.

Regina had to smile at this, sometimes the sorceress made her feel like her younger self again.

"I would get out more if that stupid Pirate stopped stalking me every five minutes and saying how all of this is my fault"

Maleficent walked in and sat at the couch right across Regina's desk, "You know, if the one you love got sucked into a vortex of pure darkness, you'll be acting all butt hurt and whiny as well"

Regina looked down at her almost empty drink and sigh.

"Too soon, my friend?", Maleficent asked sadly.

Regina looked up surprised and the sorceress smiled sadly, "I'm not stupid Regina. I known you long enough to know when you have feelings for someone. If you looked at the forest creature the same way you look at the savior, you would have married him long ago"

"Really, Mal?! Marriage. Did you smoke some outdated herbs?"

"No, I did not. Cruella was the herb lover, not me"

"That I believe", Regina smiled, "Besides, who will marry a man who has never chosen me first? A man who always chose another over me?"

"Regina…"

"Don't Mal, it's true. First, he chose his dead wife over me"

"That was your sister, Regina"

Regina stood up and threw her empty glass against the wall, breaking it upon contact. She looked back at Maleficent with rage, "Which makes it even more sick!"

She started to walk towards the sorceress, "If he really loved me, he would have done the right thing. He would have talked to his wife and told her he loved me and start a brand new life with me. But he went back to her, to be her husband. Once she was frozen, he seduced me once again, to fuck me not even 2 feet away from my parents' coffins!"

"Regina, please…"

"Emma, on the other hand, always chose me! She sacrificed herself for me!", tears started to run down her cheeks and she felt her legs grow week. She slowly walked towards the couch and sat down next to the sorceress.

"Why didn't you tell her how you felt?"

Regina calmed down before she answered, "Because she is in love with that stupid excuse of a man that I'm pretty sure also steals her makeup"

Maleficent placed a hand on top of Regina's, "I think I might have a solution to this mess, but it's a long shot"

Regina looked up, "What do you mean?"

"It's a Retrogression spell. But it has a flaw"

"What flaw? I've never heard of this spell"

"The Retrogression spell is kind of complex. When you conjure this spell, it will send you to a desired moment in time"

"And the flaw is?"

"The flaw is that the desired moment will stay in a loop until your soul's desire is achieved"

Regina looked at her like if the sorceress has grown an extra head, "My soul's desire?"

"Yes, whatever that is", Maleficent smiled sadly, "Do you want to give it a try?"

"You see Mal, I can't only think of myself in this matter. I need to think of Henry and what it's best for him."

"And what do you think is best for him, Regina?"

"To have his mother, to have both of his mothers. And I can't just give him false hope. I need an answer, something concrete"

"Then, let's give him something concrete. This can work, Regina", Maleficent stood up and walked towards the immense bookshelf on the corner of the room.

"So, what exactly do we need to cast this spell? What is the prize to pay?", Regina asked standing up and walking towards the sorceress. She noticed she was holding one of her Mother's books.

"Your mother, while rather mentally unstable, she was a true master of the dark arts", she said while passing the pages of the spell book until she found the page she was looking for, "Here we go, the Retrogression spell"

Regina started reading the spell and looked at Maleficent in horror.

"I never said that the prize was simple, my old friend"

"Time. The prize I'm going to pay is Time", the brunette whispered, "Time I could spend with my son"

"Time you could use to bring back your son's other mother, to give him his happy ending, to get your REAL happy ending"

Regina looked at the sorceress, "Will you keep my son safe while I'm gone?"

"You know I will, my old friend. And besides, I know Snow will never let anything happen to him"

"And do you trust her, you old dragon?", the brunette half smiled.

"I never said I did, but she and that pretty husband of hers are the best chance you have on keeping your son safe"

Regina took the book from Maleficent's hands and walked towards her desk, "So, I just need to read the incantation and it will take me to a desired moment in time?"

"Yes, read it to yourself and it will take you anywhere you want. Remember, you won't be able to come back to this moment in time until your soul's desire is achieved. Only you would be able to solve that"

"Ok", Regina said nervously, "Please, tell Henry I love him. Tell him I promise that I will be back with Emma"

"I will, you old fool"

"Thank you, Mal. I think I owe you one"

"You owe me nothing. You and that savior of yours found my daughter, this is the least I could do", the sorceress smiled, "Now, I will leave you alone with that book. Next time I see you, I'm hoping you succeeded on bringing back that blond idiot who decided it was a great idea to sacrifice herself for the Evil Queen"

"Go to hell, you stupid dragon"

"And leave you here all by yourself? Never", Maleficent smiled walking out of the room.

When Regina heard the front door close, she went back to the spell book.

"I hope she is right, for Emma's sake", Regina whispered nervously before chanting the spell in her mind:

 **Soles occidere et redire possunt;**

 **Nobis cum semel occidit brevis lux,**

 **Nox est perpetua una dormienda**

She started to feel funny. Her life started to flash in front of her eyes and she was unable to neither see nor feel the room anymore. All the sudden, everything went black.

* * *

A/N: Haven't written in a while, so bare with me if there are any errors. I have this story planned out and know where I wanted to go. Now the challenge is, getting to that point. Let me know what you think, this is just a brief intro.

Also, the "Spell" is an actual verse of a Latin Poem and it reads:

Sun can die and be reborn;

For us, when once the brief light dies

There is one eternal night for sleeping


	2. Chapter 1: Loop One

**Chapter 1: Loop One**

* * *

 _Actual Storybrooke…_

Maleficent knocked on the Charmings' door, Mary Margaret coming to view.

"Maleficent, why are you here?"

"I need to talk to Henry, and you as well", the sorceress answered, "May I come in?"

Mary Margaret moved out of the way, letting Maleficent in, "He is upstairs. Let me get him"

The sorceress walked towards the living room, waiting for her host to return. She looked around, taking in her surroundings. It was rather cute. Everything was as colorful and happy as Snow White herself. Looking at the other side of the room, she saw a picture of Emma, Regina, and Henry.

 **Hope you are well, my friend.**

"Maleficent?", she turned around and faced Henry, "What are you doing here?"

"We need to talk", she looked at Mary Margaret, "To both of you"

"You want to take a sit?", Mary Margaret asked.

"Yes, thank you", she sat at the couch across from them.

"So, why do you need to talk to us?", Henry asked looking towards the doorway, "Did you come with Mom?"

"No, your mother did not come with me", the sorceress looked down at her hands, "We believe we found a way to bring Emma back"

"Are you sure?", Mary Margaret asked taking Henry's hand on her own.

"Not entirely, but Regina is working on it", the sorceress smiled at them, "But I can't give you a concrete answer. Not until Regina comes back"

"Wait, where is mom?", Henry asked, his voice shaking with worry.

"At this time, I really don't know. All I know is that she casted a spell that would have taken her somewhere in time, of her choosing of course"

"What! She couldn't leave me!"

"Henry, she didn't leave you. She's doing this for you. She wants to bring your mother back"

"But Merlin?"

"If this doesn't work, we can find Merlin and bring Emma back. But for the mean time, let's give your mother a chance"

"When is she coming back?", the pixie woman asked.

"I have no idea, Snow. The spell would bring her back when she has reached her Soul's Desire. All we can do is wait"

"Soul's Desire?", Henry asked, "I don't get it?"

"It could be a poetic way to say Reach her Goal?", Maleficent smiled sadly at the boy, "Your mother told me to tell you that she loves you, and that she promises she will be back"

Henry looked at his hands, "I know she will, she always does"

"What's the prize", she heard Snow ask.

"The prize?"

"The prize she has to pay. I know how magic works"

"Well, the book says 'Time'. But neither of us know exactly what it means by Time"

"What do you think it means?"

"Well, Snow. It could be many things. But I'm starting to believe that she will loose all the time she spends in the loop, she will loose it in our current timeline"

"Wait, so if she's there a week…"

"She will loose a week here, yes. But if she misses more, like a year, we wont be able to see her for that same amount of time"

"That is insane. My mother can't be gone for that long!", Henry said, tears forming in his eyes.

"Then, lets hope that your mother solves this little problem in the quickest time possible"

* * *

Regina felt the darkness envelop her body.

 **No, not again!**

The darkness was preventing her body to make any movements, she felt impotent, like her heart was splitting in two. The pain was maddening. She opened her eyes and saw those green eyes that have been tormenting her dreams for the last two weeks.

 **Emma**

She tried to move, to walk out of this darkness and stop Emma from doing what she knew she was about to do. She needed to stop the Savior from sacrificing herself.

"Regina!", she heard Robin scream. She moved her eyes towards him and saw the desperation in his.

 **What is going on?**

She sees Robin look between her and Emma in confusion.

"Robin?", she looks at him, pleading with him, "What ever you are thinking, don't do it"

He looks back at her with anger in his eyes, "And what is that exactly, your Highness?"

 **What the hell!**

"Robin, look at me"

"Do you think I'm blind, Regina?", Robin said looking at Emma.

"Robin", Emma said stepping back, "What's got into you?"

"I don't know what you are talking about, Robin", Regina said confused.

Robin looks back at her and starts walking her way, stopping very close to the vortex and whispered, "You have feelings for her, don't you?"

Regina closes her eyes and refuses to answer.

"To bad for you, your highness. I will make sure that the only happy ending you get is with me. Whether you like it, or not", he gave her an evil grin, turning around and walking towards Emma.

"Emma!"

The blonde looked at Robin and realized he wasn't acting his usual self. He kept walking towards her and saw Hook get in between them.

"Mate, stop"

"Or what? What are you going to do, Pirate. Cut me with your hook?"

Emma looked at Regina and realized she didn't have much time left. If she didn't hurry, the darkness will finish consuming her.

"Probably"

Robin lunged towards Hook and knocked him out with a punch. Emma took this opportunity to run towards Regina, but Robin pulled her towards him by her hair and threw her on the ground.

"Emma!"

He bent down and picked the dagger up, "I don't think she'll be able to help you now. She might be out for a while. Maybe she'll even dream of her Pirate"

Regina kept looking at Emma who was unconscious on the ground, noticing blood trailing down from a large cut on her forehead. She looked at Robin with rage.

"Oh, don't be mad. She'll be fine, my Queen"

"Fuck you, Robin"

"Maybe later, on your vault", he smiled darkly walking closer to her, "Now, let's get this darkness out of the way so I could do that properly"

Robin raised the dagger in the air and felt the darkness start to surround him. Regina saw his face grow darker and darker. She had never felt this scared in her until this very moment.

 **Who the hell is this man? This is not the Robin I know.**

The darkness completely consumed him and he disappeared in the air, the dagger dropping to the ground with the name of 'Robin Hood' carved on its blade. She didn't even dare pick it up; she wanted nothing to do with him. All she could thing about was Emma. She needed to wake her up. She ran towards the Savior and drop to her knees.

"Emma", she whispered turning the blonde on her back, "Emma, please wake up"

She grasped the Savior in her arms and started to assess the cut on her head. It wasn't bad, maybe a mild concussion.

"Emma", she whispered brushing the hair from her forehead.

The Savior moaned and opened her eyes slowly, looking directly at Regina's eyes.

"I wouldn't mind waking up like this every day", the blond whispered.

"Like what, on the ground with a cut in your head?"

"No, you being the first thing I see when I wake up", Emma said placing a hand on the brunette's cheek.

"My, what such a pretty sight", they heard Robin said from behind them.

Regina helped Emma stand up and noticed that Robin had the dagger.

"Very nice of you for leaving my dagger laying on the ground"

Emma looked at Regina, "He is the Dark One?"

"Apparently so, Miss Swan"

Robin started to walk towards them, "So, what to do with you, Swan? I mean, you do realize that Regina belongs to me"

"She doesn't belong to you or anyone. She's not an object", Emma said standing between him and the brunette.

"Oh, how romantic", he said sarcastically, "Makes me want to puke"

Regina placed a hand on Emma's waist and whispered, "Don't"

"Go ahead, try and save her now", Robin said walking closer, "You are not invincible"

"I may not be invincible, Robin", she said moving closer to him, "But I will always choose my family above all things"

"So sweet of you", he whispered, "But your family won't save you"

"I don't do things waiting to be rewarded, I do them because I love the people who I do them for"

"Emma, let him be"

"Now tell me, Emma, why were you willing to sacrifice your life for a woman that has antagonized you time and time again?"

Emma looked back at Regina noticing the turmoil in her eyes, "Because she is the mother of my child", then she turned towards Robin, "Because I will always choose her"

Robin smiled and stabbed Emma with his blade directly in her heart, "Too bad she is mine", pushing her unmoving body to the ground.

"EMMA!", Regina ran towards her, grabbing her limp body from the ground, "Emma, please"

She shook the blonde's body, but it was no use. She wasn't responding. She caressed her cheek, the skin already cold. She couldn't feel a pulse; she felt the light in her heart slowly dissipate. She could feel the life being drained from the woman she loved, who once again selflessly chose her.

"Don't leave me", she lowered her head giving Emma a kiss in her forehead, tears rolling down slowly. "Please"

"Oops, I think she's dead", she heard Robin said from behind her.

She carefully placed Emma's body on the ground, looking at her one last time. She stood up and looked at him with rage and hurt.

"I'm sorry I hurt you, Regina. But she needed to go", Robin said walking closer to her, "Just like you"

Regina didn't see the blade coming; it came to quick to dodge. She felt her life starting to drain slowly. Darkness, she felt it coming again, she felt it surrounding her heart.

A sense of Déjà vu filled her mind. And then again, all went black.

* * *

A/N: And the loops start. Forgot to put a note that English is not my first language, but I'll do my best to keep the story error free.


	3. Chapter 2: Loop Two

Chapter 2: Loop Two

* * *

 _Actual Storybrooke…_

Maleficent sat on Regina's desk, going through one of Cora's many spell books, looking for an answer to why the brunette hasn't even contacted her.

 **It makes no sense**

The sorceress has read every book in Regina's office, and still not a single clue. She should have done more research on the spell; she shouldn't have made Regina perform it out of a mere 'gut feeling'.

 **I hope I didn't send you to meet your maker, my friend**

"How many books have you read already?", she heard Henry ask.

She looked up and saw him standing at the doorway.

"I think I lost count at 20"

He walked towards her and stopped in front of the desk, "Still nothing?"

"No, I'm sorry. It just makes no sense", she looked down at the book she was reading, "The spell says that the prize to pay is 'Time', but I really haven't found a straight answer for that. I mean, I really believe that she will loose the same amount of time over at the loop than in our world"

"You believe she is in another world?"

"Don't really know what to call it, Henry"

"It's been a month, Mal. A month! Shouldn't she be back already?", Henry ask with tears in his eyes, "We already started looking for Merlin! My mother already started terrorizing the town! We need my mom back! I need my mom back!"

"I know, child. I'm doing my best. But, I'm starting to believe that Time runs differently in whatever world she is"

Henry looked at her, "Relativity"

"Rela what?", the sorceress asked confused.

"Where is the spell book with the Retrogression spell?"

Maleficent opened the book looking for the page, "Here we go"

She handed the book to him and Henry tried to understand what he was reading. He made sure he read every single line in the page, but it all seemed so foreign.

"Wait"

"What?", the sorceress asked standing up and walking to him.

"It says here that the loops are a Parallel Universe in which a Human Lifetime can be stretched almost indefinitely", he looked at her in fear, "She can be stuck in there indefinitely?"

Maleficent was worried, "I'm afraid so, but I don't think that stuck is the right word for it"

"While I was in New York, I learned something in my Science class"

"Science class?", she asked looking at him like he has grown another head.

He smiled, "Yes, Science. There was this great man that had a theory. He believed that time was an illusion, that it was relative. That time is a fourth dimension in our three-dimensional world"

"That's ridiculous"

"It makes a bit of sense. I mean, he said that time slows down or speeds up depending on how fast you move relative to something else. What if mom is in a Parallel Universe like the book says. What if that universe moves slower compare to ours? What if time just ticks differently in that universe she is in!"

"Ok, you are starting to make some sense there", Maleficent started pacing the room, "But, if that's true and she is in a Parallel Universe, then maybe what she is doing is useless"

Henry looked at her confused, "What do you mean?"

"That she is in an alternate universe, she isn't in our timeline. She wont change our past, so she can't change our future. She will only change it for that timeline"

"But what if she happens to land in our timeline, in our past. She will be able to"

"What are the odds for that to happen, child? What does your science tells you?"

"It hasn't been proven", Henry sits at the couch, "But this is not science, this is magic"

The sorceress smiled fondly at him, "That child, it's absolutely true"

* * *

Darkness again, enveloping her body, making her weak.

 **This is a nightmare**

She opened her eyes to see Emma once again, staring at her with those green eyes that hunted her at night.

 **How many times will I have to go through this?**

She was raising the dagger in the air.

 **How many times will I have to watch you sacrifice yourself for me?**

She watched Hook stop her and try to talk to her, to change her mind.

 **How many times will I have to hear you tell that Pirate that you love him?**

"I love you", she says pushing herself away from him.

"Why are you doing this, Swan? Why are you willing to sacrifice yourself for her?", he asked, grabbing her arm.

"Because, even thought I love you, I'm in love with her. And I'm not going to see the woman I love loose her happiness, even if that happiness is not with me"

 **No, you idiot! You are my happiness!**

"Emma! Don't!", Regina screamed at the top of her lungs, "There has to be another way!"

 **Please, Emma! Listen to me!**

She felt the darkness dissipate, saw it surround the woman she loves once again. The vortex took her away and the dagger drop once again with 'Emma Swan' engraved on its blade. She felt tears run down her cheeks.

 **How many times!**

Hook started to walk towards the blade when all the sudden, Emma appeared in Dark One attire. Her face was dark. Her eyes were lost.

 **No**

She grabbed the blade and inspected it, "My name doesn't look that bad in this piece of metal"

She walked past the Pirate, towards the brunette, and stopped right in front of her.

"Emma, this isn't you"

"I know", she whispered, "Please, save me"

She grabbed one of Regina's hands and placed the dagger caressing her fingers. She looked up into the brunette's eyes and caressed her cheek with her free hand.

"Keep trying. How many times needed. I know you will succeed", she closed in and gave her a chaste kiss, "I love you, forever"

Then, darkness took over once more.

* * *

A/N: This one was shorter that the others, but I'm trying to divide the chapters by loops. Hope everyone is keeping up, everything will be explained. If you have any questions, just send me a message.


	4. Chapter 3: Loop Three

Chapter 3: Loop Three

* * *

Henry sat across Maleficent at her mother's home office. Their research hasn't get them too far, but their understanding on how Time works was better than when they started. Five long months have passed and yet, no sign of Regina. Merlin was found, but Emma has disappeared from the map. No one has heard nor seen her. Now that the Dark One had possession of the dagger, she was as powerful as ever. Hook had failed on keeping the dagger safe from Emma. He was too weak for the task. And the only person that could get the dagger back and keep it safe, it's lost in an unknown Parallel Universe looking for a different alternative to free Emma from the darkness.

"This is no use", Henry whispered closing yet another spell book, "There is no way we can bring Mom back. She's the only one that can bring herself"

Maleficent looked up at him and smiled, "That is true. But it's all your wanna-be stepfather's fault for being such a weak parasite"

Henry could only laugh, "Don't insult the poor parasites, and he is not my stepfather. And neither will Robin, so don't even go there"

The sorceress laugh, "I wasn't. But don't give me any ideas, child"

He smiled at the woman he has come to see like family during the past months. Now he knows why his mother cared for the sorceress. Beneath that tough exterior, laid a caring person.

"You know, I was thinking…"

"That is never good", Maleficent interrupted keeping her eyes on the book she was reading.

"Funny", he smiled, "You are not bad at all. Actually, you are one fluffy dragon under all that armor"

She looked up and raised one eyebrow, "You know, for far less I cursed a Princess to sleep. Do you want to be next?"

"But was she as cute and charming as me?"

"Not even close. But you are as annoying as her"

He smiled, "I'll take that as a complement. Now, going back to this science book I found today, there's something rather interesting that and I have no idea how to take it"

"What is it?"

"It says that Time can stretch, squeeze, change its form, but it can't run backwards"

Maleficent closed her eyes, "So the Time Regina looses, she can't never recover"

"Maybe there's another way. I mean, this is just science speaking. Maybe there is a magical way she could go to where she originally started"

The sorceress looked at him, lost in thought, "A magical way, besides that spell she used. It is a possibility"

"Alright then. Where do we start", he smiled, standing up and heading to the bookshelf.

* * *

Darkness…

 **Not again! When will it stop!**

"Regina!", she heard Emma scream her name in desperation.

She opened her eyes and saw Emma on the ground and Hook with the dagger in hand, taking the darkness away.

 **What the hell!**

The dark vortex consumed the Pirate, elevating him to the dark sky, the dagger dropping to the ground with the name of 'Killian Jones' carved on its blade.

 **Why did he do it?**

She was frozen in place, looking at the dagger in complete shock. She felt strong arms encircle her. Regina took her eyes away from the blade to find Emma embracing her from behind.

"Emma", she whispered turning around, facing the blonde.

"You came back", she said placing her hands on the brunette's cheeks, "You came back"

Regina smiled and captured the blonde's lips in a slow but still passionate kiss, putting everything she felt in it.

"But, how sweet. Leaving my dagger all unattended", they broke the kiss but it was too late to react. Hook stabbed Regina on her back, the blade cutting through her heart.

"NOOOOO!", Emma screamed catching Regina's body and lowering her to the ground.

"Emma", the brunette whispered slowly closing her eyes, feeling her strength leaving her body.

Tears travel down Emma's cheeks furiously. She clutched the woman's body tight, drawing her as close to her body as possible. She started rocking her limp body, sobbing uncontrollably.

"Please, don't leave me! Please, come back!", she couldn't control her breathing anymore. Her heart was breaking; hope was slipping away, "Please, save me"

Darkness took over Regina's mind, but not before hearing Emma telling her that she loved her.

* * *

"Regina!", Emma opened her eyes, clutching her heart. She looked around and noticed she was still in the brunette's vault, hiding form the people of Storybrooke. She was sweating, she felt fear, and she still hasn't found Regina. It's been five months since the darkness took over her, since the woman she loves disappeared into thin air.

The nightmare felt too real. Somehow, it felt like a memory. Since Regina's disappearance, the only thing she dreamed about was the day she sacrificed herself for her. It was like her nightmares were going in an endless loop.

"What the hell is going on", she whispered standing up from the bed. She couldn't sense Regina anywhere. She was starting to loose all hope.

She looked around the room. Every little thing reminded her of the brunette. She channeled her senses into the mansion, but she didn't feel any presence there.

 **Finally**

She puffed herself into the mansion and started walking around, taking in her surroundings.

 **Where did you go?**

She smiled sadly when she noticed the neat coat rack at the corner. She walked towards it and took one of the coats, carefully bringing it to her face and smelling the faint perfume of the Mayor lingering in it.

 **Why didn't I tell you how I felt?**

She hugged the coat and moved towards the office. She looked around the room, noticing books settled all over the room.

 **This is odd**

She continued to walk towards the desk and took a seat on the comfy chair. She noticed that the book was open and there were notes laying all over the desk.

"Retrogression spell", she whispered reading the contents of the page the book was open at.

"Time", she went through the notes next to the book, trying to make sense of what was written in them. She also noticed that it was Henry's penmanship.

"What are you trying to find, kid?"

She passed the pages slowly, until something caught her eye.

"A loophole that allows the order of events to be switched provided that doing so makes absolutely no difference to the workings of the universe"

She looked to her right and saw a picture of Henry, Regina, and her, "What are you trying to do, Regina?"

She closed her eyes and remembered her dreams at night, on how each time it felt different. On how each time, the events happened differently.

"The order of events to be switched", she whispered again grabbing a piece of paper and writing something down. She went to the last page of the book and placed the note there, hiding it from plain sight with magic.

She looked at the picture again one last time and puffed herself to Regina's room. She walked to the bed and laid down, coat still tightly held in her arms and closed her eyes.

 **Please, come back to me**

* * *

A/N: And here is Dark Emma. Have to say, I loved writing this chapter. I am absolutely in love with Henry and Maleficent's relationship in this story. Don't know why, but love to write them like this. Hope you enjoy this chapter and let me know what you think so far.


	5. Chapter 4: Loop Four and the Box

**Loop Four and the Box**

"What about this one, Mal?", Henry asked walking towards the sorceress with a book in hand, "It says it's able to transport objects through different dimensions"

One year has passed since Regina casted the spell and still no sign from her. Everyone has lost hope, except for Henry and the sorceress. Emma, in one of her frenzies, killed Merlin and the Apprentice, disappearing once again. It has been months since that happened. Half of the town has been hiding in Camelot ever since. Trying to bring Emma back to her senses, Hook was brutally murdered alongside Robin Hood and his Merry Men. Snow took the task to raise Roland and he's been living with the Charmings in the safety of King Arthur's Castle. Henry decided to stay with Lily and Maleficent in Storybrooke, making sure all remaining citizens headed towards Camelot.

"Let me see that", she said reaching for the book.

She started studying the page carefully, "Roaming Spell: Sends objects across dimensions or worlds with the help of a personal artifact of the receiving party"

"What do you think?", he asked hopeful, sitting down at the couch across from her.

She looked at him, "This might work. But what object do you have in mind, child?"

"I don't know"

"What about Pandora's Box?", Lily said entering the room, "Sorry, heard part of the conversation when I walked in the house"

Henry smiled, standing up and hugging her, "You are back!", he stepped away, "How is Camelot?"

She smiled down at him, "Well, you know, the usual. A land where testosterone rules the world and all creatures from the male species decides is a good idea to try to win me over so they could mate and…"

"Lily! He's just 15!", the sorceress said smiling.

"But mother, is not like he is an idiot", she said ruffling his hair, "Well, not like the Charmings"

"Hey! My grandparents, remember?", he gently slapped Lily's arm, "Be gentle"

"You are right. The right phrasing will be mentally challenged", she shoved him playfully, "Now, back to the subject at hand. I think you guys want to send some sort of object to Regina? Now, how do you know she's still alive?"

"Well, that's easy, cause she's my Mom and she is that awesome"

Mother and daughter looked at him with disbelief.

"What!"

"We all know that the awesome one here is me", the sorceress said, "But Regina is a very close second"

Henry smiled and walked back to the couch, followed closely by Lily. They both took a seat facing the sorceress who was studying the book once again.

"Personal objects, we do have many. Now, Pandora's Box, that little item we need to find"

"Last time I heard, Mr. Gold had it. Maybe if we talked to Belle?", Henry suggested taking his phone out of his pocket, "I could give her a call. She refuses to go to Camelot"

"Very well, child. Give her a call and tell her to bring the box. We'll explain our motives to her when she gets here"

* * *

Emma was laying down at Regina's bed in her vault. She opened her eyes for the hundredth time looking at the ceiling.

 **Hello stranger, you haven't changed one bit since the last time I opened my eyes**

She closed her eyes again, the darkness taking over her mind once more.

 **Emma**

She opened her eyes and looked around the room.

"Regina", she whispered sitting down at the bed.

 **Emma**

"You are driving me insane, woman!"

 **There must be another way**

"There was no other way!"

 **Yes, there is**

Emma looked around, "I can't believe I'm talking to myself"

She closed her eyes and remembered the book at Regina's office. Maybe that's the other way her imagination was referring to, that damn spell.

"I will trust you, my imaginary Regina"

 **What makes you believe I'm in your head**

"You really dare to ask that question", she laid back down and closed her eyes, her mind taking her far away.

 _She was holding Regina's body tightly against her._

" _Emma", Regina whispered slowly closing her eyes, she felt the brunette grow weaker._

 _Tears traveled down her cheeks furiously. She clutched the woman's body tight, drawing her as close to her body as possible. She rocked her limp body, sobbing uncontrollably._

" _Please, don't leave me! Please, come back!", she couldn't control her breathing anymore. Her heart was breaking; hope was slipping away, "Please, save me"_

Emma opened her eyes; her breathing out of control. It felt so real, like a memory.

"Did that really happened?", she whispered, tears slowly rolling down her cheeks, "Was it really real?"

* * *

"So, what you want to do with this box again? I don't think I heard you well", Belle asked confused. She was sitting besides Lily, while Henry was standing besides Maleficent next to the desk.

"We need to send the box to Regina", the sorceress said.

"And she is exactly where?"

"In a Parallel Universe", Henry answered playing with a rubber band in his hands.

"How the hell she got there! That's where she's been hiding?", Belle asked standing up and pacing around the room, "When we needed her the most, she ran of to God knows where"

"She's actually trying to fix this mess", Lily said, "She's trying to prevent Emma becoming the dark one"

Belle stopped and looked at them in disbelief, "She went to a different Universe, to stop our Emma on becoming the Dark One. That doesn't make any sense"

"When you put it that way, it doesn't. But the spell takes you to a desired moment in time and you can't leave until your soul's desire is complete", the sorceress explained, "Her soul's desire is to save Emma. Knowing Regina, she would spend her whole existence in that forsaken world until she has achieve it"

Belle looked to Henry and back to Maleficent, "And you believe that Pandora's Box can help her?"

"Yes", Henry answered, "I know it's hard to believe, but I know my Mom. She will bring my mother back, she will save this town"

She smiled at him and walked towards the sorceress, giving her the box. Once Maleficent grabbed it, she looked up at Henry, "What is the real reason your mother is doing this?"

Henry smiled, "Let just say, she's doing it for the town"

* * *

Darkness, the darkness was taking over her body.

 **This is maddening**

She's feeling weak, aggravated, hopeless. Opening her eyes, she saw those captivating green eyes she never grew tired of staring at looking directly into her soul.

 **Emma**

Something was different this time from the rest, she felt heavier somehow. She moved her hands around her coat and felt a bulge. Reaching in her pocket, she felt a small box. Taking it out, she recognized it as Pandora's Box.

 **What the hell?**

She looked up at Emma and saw the darkness start to surround her, freeing her from the vortex.

 **This is my chance. This has to be it!**

She ran towards Emma and went inside the vortex once more, encircling the blonde in her arms. She embraced her, as if it was the last time she would be able to do so.

"Emma, please", she whispered at her ear, "Don't do this. Think of Henry"

She felt the woman embraced her with her free arm, "I'm thinking of him"

Regina pushed herself slightly away, looking at the eyes of the woman she loves, "I love you. Please, always remember that"

She closed the distance between them, kissing her, pouring all her love in this one kiss. Emma kissed her back with the same, or even more fervor.

Regina felt the blonde lower the dagger; the dark vortex was loosing its strength. She moved her hand and grabbed the dagger from Emma's and broke the kiss.

"I can't let you go through this again"

"Again? Regina, don't", the blonde caressed the brunette's cheek, "There must be another way"

Regina smiled and kissed Emma softly, "THIS is the other way"

Emma felt tears roll down her cheeks, the brunette wiping then softly with her thumb. She placed her forehead against the blonde's; "I will make this right, for Henry"

Regina let go of Emma and stepped backwards, "Once I'm gone, take the dagger and hide it where no one can find it. Not even me"

"Regina…"

"Do you understand?", Regina pleaded raising the dagger in the air.

"Yes"

The darkness surrounded Regina's body once more, this time with more fury as the darkness was channeling the dagger. She pressed the top of Pandora's Box and activated it, dropping it to the ground. Emma looked between the box and Regina, understanding the brunette's plan.

"Regina!", she ran towards her but the darkness shocked her away, landing a few feet away from the vortex.

"No, Emma! Stay away!"

"No! You don't know where that box will send you!", she stood up and ran towards the vortex once more, being shocked away even farther than before. The darkness was too powerful.

"You are right. I don't know", the brunette said, fighting the pain the darkness was sending through her body, "But I don't care"

"What!", Emma walked closer to her, wiping tears from her cheeks, "What do you mean you don't care?"

"Because I know it will take me back to you", tears rolled down uncontrollably, "One way or another"

"Please, don't leave", the blonde whispered reaching for her, darkness sending shocks of electricity her away. She held to her arm in pain.

"I love you, forever"

Darkness finished consuming Regina. The vortex raised her into the air and fell into the ground violently, the box consuming her in its entirety.

Emma could only stare at the box, could only focus on the emptiness she felt inside.

 **I love you, forever**

"But you still left me", she whispered noticing the dagger next to the box with the name of 'Regina" carved in its blade. She walked towards it and picked it up.

 **Hide it where no one can find it, not even me**

She caressed the engraved name and looked down at the box. She bent down to pick it up but the box rose in the air and disappeared.

"What the hell"

She looked around but the box was nowhere in sight. She looked back to the blade, "Ok Regina, you've got my attention"

* * *

The box magically appeared in the mayoral mansion and opened itself, releasing Regina from it. She looked around noticing she was at her office room.

"My couch wasn't there when I left", she whispered walking around the room.

"Sorry, Mom. I changed the room a bit"

 **Mom**

She turned around and found a young man, early twenties, sporting a short beard very close to his face.

"Henry?", she said in shock, walking closer to him.

"Yes, Mom", he said with a sad smile, "I knew you were alive"

Regina stopped at her tracks, "Alive?"

"We thought you were dead, Mom. For years we looked for Pandora's Box. We knew your plan worked because Mom went back to normal"

"Emma, is she still here?", Regina asked, "How old are you? How long have I been gone?"

"Mom is still in Storybrooke and I just turned 21 a few weeks ago", Henry answered sadly, "You were gone for almost seven years"

Regina felt her legs grow weak and raised her hand, placing it on the bookshelf for support, "Seven years"

"Mom's 40th birthday was last week. That was hilarious! Hook got her a pirate ship as a cake"

Regina looked up in shock, "She's still with the pirate?"

"Yeah", Henry said walking closer to her, "Actually, they are getting married today. He needs to thank you for saving Mom. Without you, we wouldn't be able to still live in Storybrooke"

"How did I loose seven years of my life? It only felt like hours while I was in the loop!", she tried to understand how was it all possible. It didn't make any sense.

"It looks like time moved a lot slower on the loop than in our world"

She looked down at the ground, "The prize I paid was Time"

"Mom"

She looked up, "And Time is just an illusion, it is relative"

He walked closer to her, "I know I must look like a stranger to you, but I would really like to hug you"

She smiled and let this mountain of a man hug her. He towered her by a complete foot.

"Wow, you are tall", she teased releasing him, "Still can't believe I lost all that time, missed part of your life"

"But you saved the town, you stopped Emma from becoming the Dark One. You saved her"

She smiled sadly, "You mentioned she's getting married today?"

Henry looked around the room, he knew this had to be hard for her, "Yes, I guess she realized she had to do it sooner or later. Hook is over the moon with that decision"

"And her?"

"I don't know. She has never said anything about it", he placed a hand on his mother's shoulder, "We never lost hope, we knew you were coming back, Mom. Mal never gave up on you, and neither did I"

"That dragon is as stubborn as a wild banshee, I'm not surprised", she smiled, "Where is she anyway?"

"In the forest somewhere, looking on ways on killing my wannabe stepfather", he joked.

"Tell me, does he still uses that awful guy liner?", Regina smiled studying the books on her shelf.

"Yeah, and I think he started using mascara as well"

She looked at him in panic, "That guy needs to check his sexuality, mascara is just to much"

"Tell me about it, I'm afraid one of these days he'll be using one of Mom's bras", he half smiled.

"The day that happens, I'll be running down the street in my birthday suit"

"Let me know, I'll make sure Mom's there to witness that event. She'll be filing for divorce and joining you down the street"

Emma was in the shower, rinsing her hair when she felt a sharp pain in her chest. She placed her palms against the wall, fighting for balance. She looked to the ceiling and sigh.

"It can't be", she whispered silently casting a spell, a small box appearing in her hands. She opened the box to see the dagger glowing purple. Tears started to form in her eyes as she smiled sadly.

"Regina", she whispered, "You are back"

* * *

A/N: Here is a longer chapter. Now done with the loops and on with the story. Sorry for the humor, like to have a little of it around all this madness of a story. Hope you enjoyed this chapter; it was a bit hard to write as I didn't want to leave anything hanging. Let me know what you think. It's going to take me longer to update as I work for the next four days.


	6. Chapter 5: Understanding

A/N: Sorry it took me a bit of time to update but I can't update while I work. I work 13 hour days, 4 days a week, it is difficult to do so during those days. But during my off days, I can update regularly :)

For this chapter, I used a poem cited at the beginning of one of my favorite songs called 'Understanding' by Evanescence. If you so choose, you can search it and listen to the lyrics. It is a very deep song once you understand its meaning.

Also, thank you for the lovely reviews and the pointers, they are most welcome! I will work harder on my grammar :) Please, let me know what you think and enjoy!

* * *

While Regina and Henry waited for Maleficent to arrive at the mansion, they used the time to catch up. She learned that her son was attending college, Yale University no less. He was majoring in Science with a minor in History. When she asked him why he decided to study Science, his answer was not what she expected. She expected to hear one of those 'Operation Cobra' answers he always gave her as a child, but she learned that his interest came from her casting the Retrogression spell.

Henry explained to her how Maleficent and him came to the conclusion of her whereabouts using Einstein's Theory of Relativity. He went through the basics of it with her of how Time was explained as an illusion, of what was time dilation and how time slowed down or speeds up depending on how fast the object or the person was moving relative to something else. Regina started to understand her situation better, on how she lost seven years of her life in the real world while it felt like minutes during the loops.

Regina noticed Henry grew quiet and was lost in thought, "Are you feeling alright?"

He smiled sadly, "Yes, its just a lot to process. It's been seven years, mom. I have to admit, I was starting to loose all hope on seeing you again"

She started to look around the room, "I wish I had something to say to that, a beautiful answer, but I can only imagine how terrible it must feel", she looked back at him, "But now I'm here"

He nodded, looking at the ground, "Why didn't you tell me you were casting the spell in the first place?"

Regina hesitated to answer his question, "When you become a parent, all you wish for is for your child to be safe. That reason ruled out the possibility to tell you that I would be gone to save your mother. I didn't want to make any promises that I couldn't keep, Henry. I didn't want to promise you that I'll be back when I wasn't sure of that myself"

"But still…"

"I know, and I'm sorry. I know that having Emma turn into the Dark One would have broken your heart, and it did"

Henry looked at her in confusion. Regina realized that he had no idea what she was talking about.

"Wait, do you remember Emma turning into the Dark One?"

Henry moved his head from side to side, "No"

Regina stood up from the couch and started walking around the room, stopping at the window, "You don't remember. Does anyone remember?"

"No mom, I don't know what are you talking about. All I know is that you disappeared into thin air, inside Pandora's Box"

"But you know about the spell", she said turning around, "You know what the spell does, but you have no memories of what transpired, of the reason I casted it in the first place?"

"I think so. We know about the spell, but I thought you casted it to free yourself of the Dark One's power. I mean, we saw you disappear into Pandora's"

Regina looked at the ground, trying to find an explanation to all this, "This is complete madness. That's not what happened at all"

"Tell me about it, old friend", Maleficent said entering the room, "Sorry I'm late"

The brunette smiled at the sorceress, "That is my line"

"Well, I know", the blonde walked towards the couch, taking a seat besides Henry, "And yes, it is complete madness because no one remembers what actually happened"

"But it looks like you do", Regina said walking towards her desk and taking a seat, "Do you?"

"Yes I do. I was the one that gave you the stupid idea in the first place, remember?"

"True, but knowing the intelligence span dragons have"

"And knowing yours, Regina, I'm surprised you even listened to me", the brunette smiled at that, the sorceress did have a valid point.

"Now tell me, what the hell the people in this town believe happened to me?"

"Well, they saw you inside the vortex becoming the Dark One"

"No shit, Sherlock. Besides that", Regina rolled her eyes at the sorceress' answer.

"Mom, did you just cursed?"

"Don't worry honey, that's the Dark One talking", the brunette smiled playing with a pen at her desk, "She comes to play from time to time and takes over my brain, manipulating me in the process to talk and act like a badass"

Maleficent smiled, "I thought you were a bit more refined, my Queen"

"I thought you had more brains than scales, my faithful dragon"

"Ok you two, get a room", he smiled, "You two are impossible"

"And you never met us at the Enchanted Forest, we were quite a pair", the sorceress smiled looking at Regina, "But to answer your question, they thought you wanted the power. Hook convinced Emma through the years that you only wanted to become the Dark One to gain control, that you used her to become this all so powerful being, that you never intended to save her from her Dark Side"

Regina rolled her eyes, "And she believed the Pirate?"

"At the end she did, and agreed to marry his sorry ass"

"Emma can't be this stupid"

"She lost hope, Regina, she really thought you were gone"

The brunette couldn't believe what she was hearing. The Emma she knew didn't loose hope, not that easily. Through all the things the savior has gone through, this one is not the worse of those. She needed to find Emma; she needed to talk to her.

"Mom?"

She looked up and realized she was lost in her thoughts, "At what time is that wedding?"

"Tonight at seven, why?"

She looked at Maleficent, "Where is that spell book?"

The sorceress stood up, "You already lost seven years, don't be stupid"

The brunette looked back at Henry, "I need you to find a way to fix this. There must be a way for me to get that time back"

"Time can't go backwards"

"But I still landed in the past somehow, didn't I?"

Henry looked at her, lost in thought, "Well, in some way you did"

"I need to talk to Emma. I need to understand her side of the story. I need to understand her logic"

"Mom, why do you care? She loves Hook", he said standing up and walking towards the bookshelves. Studying the books closely, he found the book of spells his mother was asking for, "Here we go"

He turned around with the book in his hand and noticed his mom was gone. He looked at Maleficent confused, "What the hell just happened?"

The sorceress grabbed the bottle of whiskey next to the couch and drank directly from the bottle, "She just poof out of here"

He raised one eyebrow at her, "I can see that"

"You know how your mother can be, child", taking another sip, "She needed to stretch her legs"

"Stretch her legs my ass. She went to find Emma, didn't she?"

"Well, you know your mother, she can be stubborn as a banshee"

Henry rolled his eyes and smile, "She is stubborn alright"

* * *

Emma sat at her vanity staring intently at her reflection, lost in thought. She finished dressing for her big day, but the only thing in her mind at the moment was the dagger she was holding in her hands, the Dark One's dagger. For seven years she wondered why did it happened, why did Regina do it. She was the Savior, she was the one chosen to bring back all the happy endings, including Regina's. But she failed; the brunette was sucked into the darkness, and sacrificed herself for everyone.

 **I love you forever**

After all these years, she could still hear Regina's words echo through her mind, feel her arms around her body, her lips softly caressing hers in a kiss full of nothing but love. She had never stopped loving Regina, the memory of her whispering those words very alive in her subconscious. And now, she felt the woman she loves was back, but she wouldn't dare summoning her. If Regina wanted to see her, she would come, the blonde would never force her to do something against her free will. She wanted the brunette to choose her path; it was her decision to make.

She closed her eyes, her mind taking her to a distant memory hidden in some dark corner of her brain…

 _Hook stabbed Regina on her back, the blade cutting through her heart._

" _NOOOOO!"_

 _She screamed, catching Regina's body in her arms and slowly lowering her to the ground._

" _Emma", the brunette whispered closing her eyes slowly, her strength leaving her body._

 _Tears traveled down her cheeks furiously. She clutched the woman's body tight, drawing her as close to her body as possible. She rocked her limp body, sobbing uncontrollably._

" _Please, don't leave me! Please, come back!"_

Emma opened her eyes and looked around the room in confusion.

 **Was that real? Where did that come from?**

She looked down at the dagger and caressed its blade softly. She remembered the moment right after Regina sacrificed herself; she went to her vault to look for her, to see if she had hidden there. What she found was an empty room, no Regina in sight. She sat alone in a corner for hours thinking of all the different ways the night could have ended. One of them, with Regina wrapped in her arms finally enjoying her happy ending with the infuriating brunette or even just as friends raising their son. It didn't matter to her, as long as Regina was alive and safe.

She also remembered Maleficent entering the vault and finding her crying in the corner. The sorceress crouched in front of her and recited what sounded like a poem:

 _You hold the answers deep within your own mind. Consciously, you've forgotten it. That's the way the human mind works. Whenever something is too unpleasant, to shameful for us we, reject it. We erase it from our memories. But the imprint is always there. Nothing is ever really forgotten._

Emma looked at the mirror once more.

 **What Maleficent meant with those words?**

Maybe those flashbacks of unknown moments she was having lately, the ones that showed Regina's death, maybe those were real? Maybe, those were real memories hidden in her mind? But how that was possible when she saw her being sucked in by the vortex.

" _Because, even thought I love you, I'm in love with her. And I'm not going to see the woman I love loose her happiness, even if that happiness is not with me"_

"Have these unknown memories always haunt you, or just recently?"

 **That voice!**

Emma turned her head towards the door and saw Regina standing there, in a black long leather dress that left little to her imagination, which reminded her that the woman she loves, was the Dark One.

"They started recently, I imagine about the same time you decided to finally come back"

The blonde stood up from the chair and walked closer to her, stopping a few feet away, "Why did it took you this long?"

Regina looked down the blonde's body and admired her wedding dress. A simple white gown, down to her ankles, that hugged her curves perfectly. Slowly looking up her body, she noticed the blonde wasn't wearing any jewelry, making her even more beautiful. Emma always knew how to look classy without the need of eccentricities.

"You look perfect", Regina whispered out of breath.

Emma blushed and for a moment forgot she was due to wed Killian in a few hours. How she wished to marry the woman standing in front of her, to give her soul entirely to her.

"Don't", the blonde whispered looking at her feet.

The brunette looked up, noticing the blonde wasn't looking at her, "I know somehow this wedding is important to you and I wouldn't do anything to stop you, but I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I don't tell you…"

"Please Regina", Emma looked up and made eye contact with the brunette, "Don't you dare say it"

Regina closed her eyes and nodded, she was too late. Seven years was too much time lost that she will never recover.

"Ever since the first day I met you, Regina, I have felt everything for you. And all this time you were never able to tell me how you felt. It took a dark vortex and a near death experience for you to tell me that you loved me. After you paraded with Robin all over town, not even trying to dissimulate the fact in front of our son. Took you seeing me moving on with my life with Killian to acknowledge your feelings!", Emma walked closer to her, "And I get it, you aren't the type of girl that will say how she feels"

Emma looked down at her engagement ring and started rotating it, failing to notice a tear running down Regina's cheeks.

"But Killian did tell me how he felt, he was willing to voiced out his feelings, and I think I can be happy with him. All I want is to be happy, Regina", the blonde took a deep breath and continued, "So whatever you were going to say to me, please don't say it. Not now"

Tears ran freely down the brunette's cheeks. The blonde looked up and noticed the state Regina was in and it broke her heart. For a moment there she wanted to throw all away and take the brunette in her arms. Regina then nodded in agreement and disappeared from the room in a cloud of purple smoke without a single word.

Emma felt tears form in her eyes as she stood still, gazing at the spot Regina occupied mere minutes ago.

 **What do I do now? Should I follow my heart, or my conscience?**


	7. Chapter 6: Find Me

A/N: Thanks for all the wonderful reviews, favorites, and follows. You guys are great! Sorry for all the angst! But who said things will be easy.

Let me know what you think! Enjoy!

* * *

Emma's POV

She's gone. Just like she did seven years ago, she just took her leave and left me in this god-forsaken town to marry a man that I don't really love.

Killian, I do have feelings for him, but I'm not in love with him. The love I feel for him is difficult to explain. He gave up his ship for me, he always told me how he felt in his awful creepy way, he followed me…who am I kidding! There is nothing romantic about my situation with that pirate. His ship, that stupid excuse of a boat, really? He could have done better than that!

But Regina, she was definitely different. Since the first time we met, she hasn't made my life easy at all. But she always kept things interesting. Trying to ignore those beautiful brown eyes every time you looked at me…even in pure anger, to stop the urge that burned through my soul to just kiss you, to hold you in my arms. When did it all start?

I started liking you since I brought Henry back to this town, back to you. I lusted for you since the day I threaten your apple tree and you came storming out of your office building. I craved you since the day at the mines, the way you looked at me made me believe that you felt the same. But when did I know that I loved you? At the town line, when you sacrificed you own happiness for Henry, giving us a new life and memories, gifting us with your happy memories so we could be live a normal happy life.

And now? Now I'm getting married to a man that I don't really love. In a few hours, my life will be forever bonded to a pirate who I really wish it were you. If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with…right? Who am I kidding…

* * *

Mayoral Manor, Regina's Office

Regina walked slowly around the room trying to focus her mind on finding a way to fix this whole mess she got herself into. She has lost count on how many times she has gone through the steps of the spell in her head, everything she went through during the loopholes, time and time again. She was beginning to believe she was loosing her mind.

"There must be a glitch somewhere", she whispered stopping in front of the bookcase, searching for the spell book containing the retrogression spell.

"What are you looking for, Regina?", she heard a familiar voice ask from the doorway.

"I'm looking for the book, Mal", she answered turning towards the sorceress, "Why do I have the feeling that its not here?"

Maleficent smiled and walked towards the brunette with the book in hand, "I was looking for answers earlier but found nothing. I really don't know what to tell you besides you being screwed"

"Your positivity impresses me to the point of me wanting to kick bunnies all around town, you prick", the brunette teased walking towards the sorceress and taking the book from her hands, "And thank you for trying"

"Now little girl, calm down before I send you back to the Summer Lands by a kick on your behind"

Regina turned around and raised an eyebrow at the sorceress, "I'm not a little girl"

"Oh, believe me, I know", the blonde woman answered with a sexy grin, "Do you think its easy to forget those lovely nights spent sweaty between my sheets?"

Regina smiled and looked at the ground, "You sexy double-crossing dragon, are you going to stand there and remind me of how loud you screamed my name back in the Enchanted Forest or are you going to help me figure this out?"

The sorceress smiled sadly and walked closer to the brunette, "I was just trying to make you smile, at least for a short moment. I will find a way, my friend"

Regina looked up at Maleficent with hope in her eyes, "Will this way you are trying to find keep me from loosing any more time?"

"I don't know"

The brunette looked around the room and asked sarcastically, "So you're telling me that there's a possibility that I will finally find a way to be with Emma and she may be an 80 year old woman?"

"I'm not saying anything", the blonde walked closer to the brunette, placing a hand on the other woman's arm, "You just can't loose hope"

Regina felt a lone tear roll down her cheek and placed a hand on top of the sorceress', "I will try not too"

She let go of the blonde's hand and opened the book, studying every page carefully.

"If you need anything, just give me a call on that diabolical object that makes crazy sounds and I'll come to your rescue, my Queen", the blonde teased walking towards the entrance.

"Where are you going?", Regina asked looking towards the sorceress.

"I have a wedding to attend", she answered disappearing in a cloud of smoke.

Regina looked back to the book, "Yeah, the wedding"

She passed the pages slowly, trying to find any clues that could lead to a solution, a way to at least gain back the years she had lost. She walked towards her desk while reading the current page when she felt some sort of magic ghost in the book, a light trace left there intentionally. She placed the book on top of the desk and quickly started turning the pages until the very last one, where she felt the magic grow stronger.

"What in the world", she whispered to herself while she scanned the blank page with curiosity. The brunette caressed the page slowly, not knowing what exactly she was looking for. She felt something out of the ordinary in that page and a small piece of paper magically appeared in her hand.

Regina studied the piece of paper. She flipped it and read what was written, "I love you. Please, find me". It looked old, the penmanship looking very familiar.

"Emma", she whispered with tears in her eyes. She closed her eyes and let the tears fall down freely, "I will find you"

The brunette turned the pages, looking for the Retrogression spell, stopping when she found it. She closed her eyes to calm herself down and clear her mind.

* * *

Town Chapel…

Maleficent walked in the chapel and noticed everyone was already seated in their places and Hook was standing all the way in the front besides Blue. Apparently, they were waiting on Emma to enter the room to begin the ceremony. She looked to her left and right, no Emma to be seen. She started to walk slowly towards the back room, which was hidden, from the expecting crowd to see if she could find the other woman. The sorceress stopped in front of the door and gently knocked on its surface.

"Go away", she heard the answer from the inside of the room. She looked around to see if anyone followed her. Noticing she was alone in the corridor, she poofed in the room.

She saw Emma looking out the window, lost in thought.

"Hey"

The sheriff turned and faced Maleficent. The sorceress noticed the dried tear tracks on the other woman's cheeks and her makeup all ruined. She walked closer to the other woman and magically poofed a handkerchief, handing it to Emma. The sheriff smiled sadly and grabbed the offered object, "Thank you"

"You welcome, honey. Now the question that everyone out there is asking is why aren't you out there? The groom doesn't look too bad. He looked like he showered and even shaved", the sorceress said placing a hand on the other woman's shoulder.

"He did? It took him a wedding for him to shower?"

Maleficent smiled, "At least your sense of humor is intact. I can see where your son gets it. Well, like ten percent of it cause the rest it's all Regina's doing"

Emma looked down at the mention of the brunette's name and felt tears starting to form again.

"Now my question to you is, why are you still here and not making any effort in going after the woman you love?"

The sheriff looked up and dried her eyes with the handkerchief, "Because I'm a coward and stupid"

"The stupid part I can believe, not the coward part", the sorceress said lowering her hand and stepping closer to the window, right next to Emma, "I once read a text in one of Henry's books that changed my view of love completely"

"Henry's books are dangerous to read", Emma teased, turning to face the older woman.

"They are a gamble, but they hold some truth between their verses of nonsense", the sorceress smiled, "It said that love is the only thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends dimensions of time and space"

Emma looked at her in confusion, "Where did you read that?"

"Some university book, I think it was poetry?"

"Transcends time and space", the blonde whispered and an image came to mind:

 ** _She was holding Regina's body tightly against her._**

 **" _Emma", Regina whispered slowly closing her eyes, she felt the brunette grow weaker._**

 ** _Tears traveled down her cheeks furiously. She clutched the woman's body tight, drawing her as close to her body as possible. She rocked her limp body, sobbing uncontrollably._**

 **" _Please, don't leave me! Please, come back!", she couldn't control her breathing anymore. Her heart was breaking; hope was slipping away, "Please, save me"_**

Emma looked at Maleficent, "It wasn't a dream? It really happened?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Regina, saving me from becoming the dark one and dying in my arms?"

The sorceress smiled sadly, "It did, child"

"Did Regina traveled through time to save me?", the sheriff whispered.

"Yes, she did. That's why she disappeared for such a long time"

"And it took her seven years?"

"Apparently, she lived the same moment in time constantly until she could save you. The prize for doing so was loosing seven years of her life", Maleficent faced the blonde, "Technically, the prize she had to pay was Time. But she did all this for you"

Emma looked towards the entrance and back at the sorceress, "I need to see her"

"Well child, you do know you have a wedding to attend"

"Fuck the wedding. Why would I choose a man I'm not in love with over the woman that I've fallen in love with so many years ago?"

Maleficent smiled, "Then you must hurry before Regina gets the bright idea of jumping back into the loophole"

"Wait, she's thinking on casting that spell again?", Emma asked worriedly.

"Yes. She thought she had lost you forever"

"Well, she didn't. But I need two favors from you and I'll do whatever you want"

The sorceress smiled evilly, "Anything?"

"Except a three-way! Fuck that! I don't share!", Emma smiled, "Please, seriously"

"Yes child, I was just teasing you. What do you need?"

"First, I need you to poof me to wherever Regina is"

"Ok, done. The second favor?"

"Can you please walk out there and make an excuse for me? Get creative"

Maleficent smiled, "The last thing you should tell me is for me to get creative with a crowd of peasants. You could end up being an orphan once again"

"Really, woman! You need to control yourself! No wonder Lily is such a pain in the ass!", Emma rolled her eyes.

"Alright, I'll behave. I'll find out something to tell them. Now, to Regina you go", the sorceress waved her hand and poofed Emma to Regina's location.

"Now, get creative", Maleficent said looking towards the door, "What the hell could I tell these peasants? And where did Emma get the bright idea my daughter is such a pain in the ass?"

* * *

Emma opened her eyes and found herself at Regina's porch. She needed to think fast. Slowly, she moved her hand to the doorknob and sigh in relief when she turned it and the door was unlocked. She walked in and closed it behind her. Looking around, she noticed the house was dark except for the office. She walked in that direction and stepped in slowly, noticing that Regina was standing in front of her desk, silently reading from a book in her hand. She quickly jogged towards the brunette and took the book from her hands tossing it to the side, surprising the older woman who hadn't notice that the blonde was in the room with her. Emma grabbed Regina's blazer and pulled her into a passionate kiss, placing all her feeling towards the other woman in it. How could she have ever chosen Killian over her? She almost lost the other woman because she was too afraid the feelings weren't mutual. If she could just turn back time, stopping Regina from ever being with Robin and herself from being with the Pirate. Life would have been so different. But now, here she was, kissing the woman she loved who had encircled her between her arms while her mind was playing what ifs.

Regina slowly broke the kiss, more because the need for air than anything else. She opened her eyes and looked into Emma's deep green ones. The brunette felt a lone tear travel down her cheek and smiled sadly at the blonde.

"Weren't you supposed to be at your wedding?", the brunette whispered.

"What wedding?"

Regina smiled sadly, tears falling faster, "You didn't marry him?"

Emma used Maleficent's handkerchief to dry the brunette's cheeks, "I couldn't"

Regina slowly broke the embrace and walked towards the window, leaving the blonde confused.

"Are you ok?", Emma asked walking closer to her, "Why are you crying? I thought you would be happy"

The brunette closed her eyes and took a deep breath, "Because if you had told me…I…"

Realization hit Emma and she turned around, grabbing the book from the couch and looking at the page Regina was reading a minute ago.

"The spell…you cast the spell again?", she whispered, tears clouding her vision.

The brunette turned to face Emma and started to feel the effects of the spell, "I really thought I had lost you forever"

The blonde looked at her, noticing she could see through the brunette's body, "Regina, don't do this to me"

"I can't stop it now, it's to late"

Emma walked closer to the other woman, holding the book tight in her grip. She stopped right in front of her and placed her hand in Regina's chest, feeling the brunette's heart beating rapidly. Tears clouded her sight as she looked at the Regina's eyes. She slowly closed the distance, placing a chaste kiss on her lips.

"I will love you forever", the brunette whispered, disappearing completely.

Emma opened her eyes, no Regina in sight. She couldn't feel her presence in this world anymore. She was completely gone. Tears ran freely down her cheeks and she fell to her knees, sobbing uncontrollably.

"REGINAAAAA!", she screamed at the top of her lungs, holding tightly to the book in her hands.

"Why did you do this to me again?", she whispered, looking down at the book. She felt rage burn in her stomach and she threw the book against the far wall, falling with a loud thump on the floor.

She felt herself calm down a little and slowly stood up, walking towards the place the book had fallen, noticing a piece of paper on the ground. Bending slowly, she picked it up and read the small note, "I love you. Please, find me"

She noticed the note was written in her own handwriting, "It was me, I wrote this. But I don't remember doing so"

Emma looked at the ground towards the book, "But what if I'm the one that needs to find you, Regina?"


End file.
